Continuing Ramblings of the Haphazard Gardener

Glorious sunshine in April brought tulips, blossom, the first butterflies, bumblebees and spring at last to the garden and the Triangle was awash with good intentions and productive plans until the distinctly wintery start of May stopped the overly enthusiastic sowing of lettuces and basil.  The Squirrel Menace [ see last month’s musings ] returned and seemed to have mastered the ability to swing from twig to twig through the Beech hedge in the manner of Johnny Weissmuller [ undisputed best Tarzan ever  in this columnist’s book ] – wiping out the impregnable bird feeder in the process.  It was a tough winter for all things feathery and furry and this explains the increase in the amount of tulips that have gone the way of all tasty squirrel snacks. The surviving tulips are now flowering but have almost all turned out to be purple -   likely to happen when planting the leftovers from last year’s colour themed beds but bad news when the desired effect was of a riot of mixed colours.  Red and white striped Parrot tulips [ Estella Rijnveld ] looking like raspberry ripple ice-cream that’s been through the office shredder were too irresistible though.  They are not at all practical, they need staking a lot of the time, they don’t live very long and they have been described as overblown, vulgar and plain messy but they are the glorious tulips of 17th century Dutch Art and a corner of the triangle had to be found for them.

Ducklings in the Garden

The May highlight has to be the appearance, on the afternoon of Friday 7th, of a family of  ducklings who took to the pond, probably having hatched that morning.  Unfortunately, the pond was a bit on the low side due to recent lack of rain so Tony and Norman hastily mounted a rescue operation involving a plank and a hosepipe.  Their parents are not the only birds to be nesting in the garden and it’s a reminder that the garden is a great home for wildlife – not because it has been specially created as a ‘wildlife garden’ but because it’s home to wide variety of plants and trees providing food and shelter.  But now that the squirrels have hopped off back to Duncombe Park to have babies, it’s not all gloom and doom in the pesky creature department – mice, pheasants and squirrels will keep up the good work where they left off.  Only the other day, a fellow Triangler erected a stout thicket of thorny twigs over his peas as a deterrent against the pigeons and a support for the growing plants – great idea.  Sadly, he hadn’t counted on the mice playing the old ‘Great Escape’ card – yes, they tunnelled their way in when the guards were distracted and ate all the peas.

The Triangle first came alive on graph paper in the autumn.  Once the serious planting started in April the plan has tended to be governed by what is ready to go in next but the plan was really important in marking out the part of the plot for growing Root veg – in this case Beetroot, Turnips and Radishes – so that it was NOT manured.  If earthy comedy is required, manuring root crops normally results in Baldric-style rude and unusually shaped vegetables.  Great excitement was caused towards the end of April by the sudden appearance of 4 or 5 seedlings.  At first they were thought to be Clarkia but, on further reflection, it was decided that they were either Turnips [ golf ball sized Market Express ] or Radishes [ Sparkler ].  Labels would have been a good idea – must make a note for future reference- but, at the time of sowing on a rather glorious afternoon in mid-April, it was just impossible to decide between the relative aesthetic merits of wood versus slate and plastic was not to be thought of.  And now who’s paying the price?  The poor old Radishes [ or Turnips ] that’s who.  Radishes were a real taste discovery of last year but Nicholas Culpepper has a few words of warning [ or did in the 17th century ].  Culpepper’s herbal says that Radishes have not much nourishment, provoke urine and are very ‘windy’.  Culpepper has a lot of vegetables down as being ‘Windy’ and one remedy is Thyme.  As it happens, Thyme has been planted in the gravel under the Medlar tree but there are no plans to concoct its juices as yet. 

Having a plan for the triangle is also important to prevent all out War on the vegetable patch.  If the Legume family has to sit near any of the Allium family then there is likely to be a battle which will be won by the onions.  Potatoes don’t really like having Courgettes or Pumpkins as neighbours either but, on a small plot, there is a limit to what you can do to keep all the neighbours happy and, of course, all kinds of veg will grow together on the Triangle and crop rotation will be limited.  Having said that, W Robinson and Son, the company whose seeds produce most of the prize winning giant vegetables you are likely to see, say that they have been raising their giant onions in the same bed for the last 140 years. They recommend the application of Jeyes fluid to remove bacteria and there are some good tips on their website www.mammouthonion.co.uk

A lot of things that would normally be in the ground now are still waiting to get started because of the weather [ a bit like their owner ] but greenhouse sown Red Cabbage, Purple sprouting Broccoli and Sunflowers are going great guns in the cold frames and Tomatoes, Chilli peppers, Butternut Squash and Chrysanthemums are doing well inside.  Some things went in the middle of the Easter holidays because it was a gorgeous day, they were ready and also because there was a free day to do it.  Not being at the garden every day and doing volunteer jobs in the main garden as well means that you have to do what you can when you can and just try not to have too big a backlog.  So there were red and yellow Shallots, Stuttgart Giant  and  Red Baron Onions and some Chives to join the Garlic in the Allium corner and waxy Pink Fir Apple and Osprey Potatoes.  3 Pink Fir Apples are also growing in a broken plastic pot filled with soil and compost from the compost heaps.  Although they need watering regularly, they are there to show that anyone really can grow their own spuds without spending too much money.  In the not too distant past [ last year ] 3 or 4 Anya potatoes, from the supermarket, which had sprouted pretty substantial eyes in the vegetable rack, were successfully grown in a bucket even though they had been planted upside down because someone thought the eyes made the roots!  It all sounds very ramshackle but the potatoes didn’t seem to care, they turned themselves the right way up and tasted just as good.  At the other end of the plot , in went too many Broad Beans [ Aquadulce ] except there is no such thing as too many broad beans when there is such a thing in the world as a Tapas of broad beans and black pudding, some 18th century Scarlet Flowered Broad Beans, some Feltham’s Peas and some astonishing Hirst Greenshaft Peas.  They’re astonishing because they are bubble gum pink when they are sown – alas, it doesn’t last.  The peas have to be netted because about 2 seconds after germination the pigeon bush telegraph goes out and it’s snack time.  It’s a bit like a Legume Youth club at this end as there are also some old fashioned Sweet peas growing up a cane wigwam.  Half of the Sweet peas were autumn sown in traditional loo roll innards and half were sown inside in March so it will be interesting to see if there is ultimately any difference between them.  Of Broad Beans, Culpepper’s Herbal says they are governed by the planet Venus but are ‘extremely windy meat’.  On the plus side, the water distilled from the flowers is apparently good for getting rid of wrinkles.  Onions are also ‘flatulent or windy’ but are apparently just what you need if you’ve been bitten by a mad dog. It’s the most marvellous bed-time reading.  Mint is growing in a pot [ to keep it from spreading ] buried in the ground [ so it dries out less easily ] but visitors of a nervous disposition beware – it ‘STIRS UP BODILY LUST’.

Talking of which, after watching ‘How to make your own Drugs’ on TV and breathlessly overly fixating on the lovely James Wong, an Echinacea found its way on to the triangle.  They are so gorgeous and so attractive to insects but, as yet, there are no plans to start extracting cold and flu remedies from the roots.  Flowers will be a really important part of the Triangle – for pollination and to attract beneficial insects but also to add colour and to be beautiful as well as useful.  Papaver rhoeas – the traditional Field or Flanders Poppy – seedlings are starting to show dotted about the place and they will hopefully soon be joined by Pot Marigolds and an edible Victorian Nasturtium Empress of India.  When the tulips go over there should be Cornflowers to fill in some of the spaces – the black ones making the most stunning cut flowers.  Ideally the plot will be almost choked with plants and no patch of soil will be left bare.  Things will grow small because they are grown close together or picked early and this will mean more variety and hopefully more taste.  The colder May weather may have brought a temporary slowdown but as soon as there is warmth in the sun again, the weeds and the planting will gallop ahead.


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